Unleash your storytelling

0:00 The topics and opinions expressed on the following show are solely those of the hosts and their guests, and not those of W four WN Radio It's employees or affiliates. We make no recommendations or endorsement for radio show programs, services, or products mentioned on air or on our web. No liability, explicit or implied shall be extended to W four WN Radio It's employees or affiliates. Any questions or common should be directed to those show hosts. Thank you for choosing W four WN Radio. This is Beyond Confidence with your host w park. Do you want to live a more fulfilling life? Do you want to live your legacy and achieve your personal, professional, and financial goals? Well? Coming up on dvparks Beyond Confidence, you will hear real stories of leaders, entrepreneurs, and achievers who have stepped into discomfort, shattered their status quo, and are living the life they want. You will learn how relationships are the key to achieving your aspirations and financial goals. Moving your career business forward does not have to happen at the expense of your personal or family life or vice versa. Learn more at WWWA You Done divopark dot com and you can connect with div at contact at divpark dot com. This is beyond confidence and now here's your host, div Park. Good morning listeners, It's Tuesday, and here's what I'm going to share with you my personal story today. It started out to be very exciting because I love bringing you great guests, and because this is a live show, you're right there at the time calling the guests,

1:30 you know, emailing in no response, and of course, you know, you know, usually people have something come on or something happens, and yet when it's a live show, the clock is ticking, ticking, ticking. And then we decided like, okay, the show must go on. And I was thinking, okay, what can I speak to you about today? And I thought about storytelling because storytelling is very very close to my heart. I love storytelling and I want to share a funny story with you. Then I used to be a kid. I used to love writing short stories and poems. And what used to happen was that I don't know if you've seen that or not, or if you remember or not. When you were young, usually parents will ask the children to come in, especially when you have company at home and people are visiting, they'll say, oh, you know, my daughter plays great piano, and they'll ask you to play or sing a song or just kind of share, like, oh, look at this painting. So rather than my parents asking me to do anything, they would have my short stories and poems and just Russian people would have just have dinner, oh and be like here, oh, I want to share my story with you. And of course after I grew up, people told me

3:06 you wouldn't even let us take a bread and you would just rush it and I would be feeling bad and they would say, look, oh, we were just kidding. We loved listening to your stories. And what they shared was that even though they had visited and known a lot of kids, but somehow I had left an impression because I used to just gush through and had this passion around storytelling, and that's what they remembered. They don't remember my stories because of course, you know, when you are six seven, sometimes stories make sense, sometimes they don't. So they used to be all about imagination, and you know, I used to have all imaginary characters where I would make up the characters like oh, there is this wizard and all that.

3:59 But the membered my passion around it and what stories do. So before we go on to our stories, one thing I want to share with you is that I want to thank you. I really want to thank you for getting our books, because when you buy our books, it's really really important that we know how are those books helping. So these books help in three ways. They help you whether you get the Entrepreneur's Garden or expert influencer. They'll live you a better life. They'll help you to grow your business, or they will help you with your courage. They will help you build a better relationship with yourself, I have a better career, build a connection with the audience now. At the same time, what we do is we take profits from our books and give it to keyo dot org. So that's the biggest thing, and for us, it's a three way thing. I love it that I'm able to share my message with you and it's making an impact.

5:15 It's making an impact in your life, and it's impactful to you because you're making an impact on somebody else's life as we give donations to keywot dot org. So what are we going to be talking about storytelling today? Let's take a look at why does storytelling work. Let's go back ages and ages back when there were no languages, nothing. People would sit around the fire or people would be sitting at night and grandparents or parents would share stories about their lives. They would share stories about their parents, your grandparents and pass it down. And here's what I'm so much in love about storytelling is because storytelling sticks. Storytelling is such a beautiful way to share your experiences, to share your achievements without sounding braggadocia's without sounding arrogant, without sounding like la la la la, you know, look at me. No, it's nothing of the sort. It's all about You're not singing, You're not like going and being boastful. It's just a beautiful art where you can take your stories, your client stories, and you can share it without having any and I mean

6:51 yes, without having any hesitation, because all you're doing is you're sharing. So what is the first step in storytelling? The first thing I'm going to ask you to do is understand your audience. So now, for example, here's what I'm going to share. Like, you know, in a couple of days, I'll be speaking in a conference to coaches, So think about it. If my audience is coaches, and now if I go and talk about insurance stories about insurance agents that I've helped, or stories about lawyers that I've helped, it's not going to land. Versus if I have stories about my clients who are coaches, it makes a difference. They can correlate with that and why they can correlate. So here's my story and then there's their story. The story matches their lives. The stories matches their pains, problems, desires. And the key is to tailor and customize your story to the audience. So when you do that, they are able. Yes, they're able to connect with it. And what does a good story look like?

8:13 If we were to just you know, given the time we have today, we are not going to be able to delve into it, and yet we will cover enough so that you can go and share your story. So the first thing we talked about was who is your audience? Know your audience, What are the pains, what are the desires? So I'm going to share with you. Just recently, I had spoken at a writer's conference about how to write a compelling story and what is what are the key elements? So now all of the audience was either prospective writers, or they were authors, or they were best selling off so I mixed it up in my story so like one of the stories was about myself. So after having written multiple books, I shared my story like how one time, and here's what I'll shared with you too. I was sitting in front of my computer, staring at the black page in in winter. Yes, it was a cold winter.

9:24 It was very, very cold and chilly, even with the heater running, and even after I opened up the blinds, the sky was overcast and there was practically like evening during daytime. It was cold and dreary, and I was dreading writing because I had been experiencing writer's block for several days. But I pushed myself and I just like, Okay, you can do it. I'm trying positive affirmations and I'm trying a lot of different things. I'm sitting at the computer looking at the blank screen. Nothing is happening. I'm experiencing real writer's blog. It's not in my head. And then I'm like, okay, you know what, let me check my emails and then I'll come back to this blank page. I go, I click on my emails, and I the first email that I see got the subject line thank you, and I'm like, h it definitely caught my attention. I clicked open that email and guess what I see? It was one of my readers, somebody who had read The Entrepreneur's Garten and this is what they said, Diviat,

10:56 thank you for writing this book. It was almost as if somebody jumped out of the page and gave me the permission to be who I am. And guess what that lit that fire in my soul. Yes, my energy exploded. The words poured out of me. And this is one of the times when I was writing expert to influencer, and that's when I remembered what was my why? So the first thing we talked about was your audience. The second thing to know is what is your why? Why do you want to share your story? Why do you want to speak to them? So as I was sharing this story with the writers, it resonated with them because usually writers write for a certain passion. I know why I write. I want to make people's lives better. I want to come and join you so that you can live a better life. You can create an impact. And what's a better way than writing a book and sharing your stories because you can speak from a place where you're speaking from one to many, not just one on one. And don't get me wrong, speaking one on one or one to one is as impactful as speaking from one from a place of one to many.

12:30 And why is it impactful Because even when you impact one person, people around them will get impacted. And when people around them get impacted, they'll impact other people. So it's a ripple effect regardless. So that's why storytelling is important. So second, know your why. So I shared with you my wife. Now, remember that there are key elements of your story. Every good story has a big thing. There's that setup, Okay, what's happening. Then every good story has the middle, some conflict, something's going up, and then there's an end to it. Resolution. So I'm going to just take my story and share with you. Wow, we can apply that framework to the story that I told you. So here's the thing.

13:26 There was a beginning. We talked about this cold, dreary day, overcast eyes. It sets the scene talking about my feelings. It shows the mood, and then I talk about the middle, the conflict that's happening. I feel that my soul has dried up. I feel that I've lost my touch, I don't have any motivation. So that is the conflict. Basically that it was the lack of motivation to write. I had lost sight of my purpose. I had lost sight of my north star. And then what was the resolution? That email popped up. And as soon as that email popped up, it lit my inspiration and bam, that spark went from being a spark into a fire. And then the warmth of that fire just melted that cold in my heart and got my creative juice is going. So those are the elements that go along with a good story. And of course here's what I'll tell you. There are several several different frameworks that we can cover today.

14:39 We are going to cover enough so that you can get started. Okay, so now you have a story, then what you do with it? Here's what I'll share with you. As always, I'm going to invite you or listen to this podcast and give me your feedback. What did you like about it? What else would you have liked me to share with it? So engage with your audience, connect with them. It can be through your book, it can be through your social media, It can be through your video, It can be through your blogs. It can be through your podcast just as I'm doing right now. So important. And then the key is always remember consistency because the more consistent you are with your practice, the more you will get better at it. And one of the best things to do is take one of your We talked about at the beginning about turning your experiences or an accomplishment into a compelling storytelling. Take one of your biggest accomplishments.

15:50 Okay, and now it cannot just be one. It can be three or four as well. Sit down with it and create your signature story. Yes, or that story that represents your brand, story that represents your accomplishments, that represents your journey over adversity, that showcases how you overcame trauma. It can be anything. So here's what I will share with you. A couple of good examples are. One is Steve jobs commencement speech and he does you storytelling surprisingly like you know, you would think that Steve Jobs would not know.

16:41 So that is one of the things you can look at because it's a really good example of a comparing compelling storytelling. Another one is Cheryl Sandberg her book Lean In. She uses a lot of stories in her books, and of course I have used storytelling in all of my books. If you look at Expert to Influencer, we have shared a story how an entrepreneur grows, how she just unfolds, and how she realizes her potential as she's implementing the principles in the book and similarly in Entrepreneur's Garden, it's a beautiful story of different friends showing up and like, you know, what are they struggles and how beautifully they become who they're at. And always remember it's really important to emphasize the conflict because when you emphasize the conflict, it's important to share emotions.

17:47 It's important to come from a place of tadbit of vulnerability, because here's the thing, if you're not vulnerable, then it will sound very step. It's important to share a piece of yourself. I'm not saying that go and share all of your dirty laundry. No, just share a piece of yourself because that's what people relate to people. And as I shared that that in the beginning, I was struggling, and as I was speaking with our sound engineer one, it's like, Okay, I don't know what title I can come up with because my head was all prepared for the guests that we were going to have, and it's okay. We all struggle. It took us a few minutes and we started out late, but it's okay. It's okay to create that space for yourself and create that space for people because things happen.

18:53 People will fail, you will fail. It's important have that grace because what I believe is that it's okay to fall, it's okay to fail, it's okay not to give up. And one of the key things is also knowing that when you make mistakes on them. And here's what I'll share with you is that I tell all my clients as I help them with storytelling and book writing, I hold them and I tell them, like you know, write down your why and keep it right in front of your computer, on the wall or wherever it is where you can see, especially when you're writing your book. And guess what I had forgotten to do that. And after that email, here's what I'll share. I have laminated my why, and whenever I'm writing, I will look at it because I know that I am going to experience writer's block, I am going to fail. So we did look at it. Now you may say that. Okay, Divia, how can I identify potential stories? So here's what I'll say is that if you look upon your life, look at like you know, what left an impact on others? Or what was that moment that made you feel fulfilled? What

20:25 was that moment when you felt pride, when you felt like, yes I got this, I did this. So always remember like mostly those stories work really well where you can have a setup, where you can have a conflict, and where you can have a resolution. And it just doesn't mean like when I talk about resolution, it just doesn't mean that it has to end in success. It can end in a learning. Yes, yes, yes it can end in a learning. So here's what I'll share with you, like for today, right, like I share my story. So setup was all excited about the show, as always, I'm always excited about the show because I love talking to you. What was the conflict? The guests didn't show up. We are calling, like you know, we had a couple of phone numbers calling them, and so there's that struggle in what happened is a success? Two things happened as a success or resolution. We didn't have the guest show up and that was okay. So right there in that moment, we went with the floor and the resolution was that Okay, I would love to speak to you as well as the resolution was that I get to share my struggle with you. That it took me some time to come up with titles. Usually I'm very good with titles. So it shows you that

22:00 prompt you. So even though it was a small event, but we could create a story out of that. And when you have those three things when we talked about the setup, conflict, and resolution, what it's going to do is it's going to help you build that narrative. It's going to help you have that flow and structure of that story. And one of the best things I'll tell you, yes, I'm not talking about the computer. I'm not talking about your phone speaking into the phone, I'm not talking about your iPads. Go take a moment and sit down in your favorite place and go to that old fashioned way a pen and a notebook. Just write it out stream of consciousness. Just write it out. And if you are one of those who love to speak into your phone, and that's fine too. Again, there is no one's said that fits all and if you can write it out, if not, then speak into your phone and if not, type it up. But this is just something very powerful about writing it out and then share your story wherever you get a chance. It could be while you're speaking to your team, it could be when you're speaking to your client.

23:26 It could be when you're sharing it with your friends. It could be where you are narrating as a speaker. It could be on your podcast or as a podcast guest, or on your blog, and ask for feedback. Did your story touch people? What did they like about it? And, as I always invite you, please share your feedback. We always welcome your comments and I love your comments. I love you reaching out to me and talking to me. You have been so vocal, So use that feedback to refine your story and garnish it. Always stick to the facts and to the truth, and so that way the core of the story will never ever change.

24:25 And it helps you to remember it because so many times people will say, oh, then how do I remember? Like what woulds I have to use? And here's what I'll share with you. I'm sitting here right in front of you with zero preparation. The key thing is to know what you are speaking about, know who you're talking to, so I know y'all. I know my audience, I know my wife that I want to make an impact. I want to share with you story so that you can go out there and share stories with people like you can even create a group where you can have storytelling group where y'all can share the stories. So, for example, one of the things, like you know, it's really important is to just post formulate a story. And once you have formulated a story, then you go ahead and share it out because that's what's going to give you the confidence.

25:27 All right now, a lot of my clients will come and share with me that you gave me this framework. I'm still stuck that fear is there that what if I share a story in it does not land. So I'll share with you. One of the things that you can do is map out the commonalities between you and your audience. So, for example, I'm going to go back to the writer's conference. I had experienced writer's block. A lot of my fellow audience, aspirational or the writers, had experienced a block to So now if I'm sharing my story about experiencing and overcoming my writer's block, do you think that will resonate? It definitely will resonate. And here's what I'll share. Keep it simple, just like as if you were speaking to someone else. The more simple you keep, the more it will be universally understood, and the more it will resonate with your audience. And how can you garnish it? So the garnish is like you know, one of the best things garnishing is adding your emotions, which we talked about a little

27:04 bit earlier, where you are weaving in some details that can resonate and evoke emotions in the audience. So let me share with you another story. So recently, while I was coaching one of my clients, a wonderful, an amazing woman, and she is a very accomplished woman. I have utmost respect for her, and she shares with me that she's scared because she got an opportunity to speak to a large audience. We're sitting there looking at each other and I could literally see fear in her eyes. And I have not seen her shy away from speaking before, so this was something very new to her.

28:15 So asked her what has changed, and what she shared was that what was different about the audience was that the audience was made up of all financial professionals and that She had never spoken to financial professionals before. So we sat down and we talked about it. Like I said, Okay, if you were to put yourself in their shoes, where do you think are the areas that are common to you and them? So she took a few minutes, and as she was reflecting during those moments, she shared, Hmm, I like numbers because I'm analyzing data and they work with data. So by that token where both logical audience is logical, I'm logical. I make data driven decisions. They make data driven decisions. I could see the sparkle in her eye. It was almost as if this heavy weight had been lifted off her

29:45 shoulders. And then she was in her element, just sharing one story after another. You know what, divia, I could speak to them with this way, like you know how the numbers are. I can use this story, this story, this story. So going from having nothing to speak to them, she had so many stories that we had to meet for a couple of more times to narrow it down to three and keep to do three points during her speaking engagement. So if you kind of take the story again, it follows the same framework set up conflict resolution. So that's what I'm going to ask you to do is to just start out with this simple framework and work with it. And one of the good ways to also know if your story is learning or not. Well to finish her story, she did go, she talked with them. She was speaking in person, which is wonderful, and she saw that her story resonated with people. And like even if you're speaking on zoom, you will realize if people are nodding their head, and people's body language will tell you if your stories are resonating with them or not. Really really important. So here's what I have shared with you.

31:15 Have shared with you quite a few things. And then sometimes you may be facing a difficult situation. There's so many times you could be speaking at someone's funeral, and that's one of the hardest things to do, really one of the hardest things to do. So or you could be speaking to someone that you're laying them off, or you could be telling a vendor, or you could be telling as a client to your coach, or you could be telling as a coach to a client. You could be sharing some difficult situations.

32:01 So it's really important that you recognize that adversity is part of life. It's not going away. It's going to be there, and that in that moment of fear, in that moment of hurt, healing needs to happen. Hope needs to surface. So remember that to not forget your why. And then you remember your why, that storytelling will come through and you will be able to practice empathy and courage and make an impact. And in this way you can take your experiences and turn it into storytelling where you're just sharing and impacting others. Here what I'll share with you. I've got some great news, folks. We have launched a storytelling program. So if any of you are interested in how to turn your experiences into those beautiful stories where you can share accomplishments where you never have to brag ever, reach out to us at contact at divrparty dot com and let us know and we'll share with you the details

33:35 about storytelling. How you can become a master at storytelling and never have to feel And if you know storytelling, you never have to sell, You never have to feel uneasy, you never have to be sleazy, you never have to be pushing anybody. You share your stories, make your points stick and as a result, you make an impact. So thank you listeners for joining us. Without you, the show would not be possible. You are awesome and our whole team loves you. And thank you for reaching out back to us, staying in touch with us. And also thank you on for making the show possible and being there right there with us during these troubles and creating like you know, rearranging the show, doing it everything. So thank you, Thank you everyone, and be well, be strong and be inspired.

34:39 Until next time, take care. Thank you for being part of Beyond Confidence. With your host d V Park, we hope you have learned more about how to start living the life you want. Each week on Beyond Confidence, you hear stories of real people who've experienced growth by overcoming their fears and building meaningful relationships. During Beyond Confidence, Dvpark shares what happened to her when she stepped out of her comfort zone to work directly with people across the globe. She not only coaches people how to form herd connections, but also transform relationships to mutually beneficial partnerships as they strive to live the life they want. If you are ready to live the life you want and leverage your strengths, learn more at www dot dwpark dot com, and you can connect with vat contact at dvpark dot com. We look forward to you joining us next week